The new golden rule.
I know it’s been a while since I filled this little corner of the internet. I thought that I’d pick the baton back up as soon as summer started but as I’m sure you can tell, that isn’t quite what happened.
This summer has been equal parts busy and restful but more than anything it’s been a transition. I haven’t had a summer where I wasn’t drowning in work for Y E A R S and it’s been nice but it’s also been… odd.
I work from home and money in my household is currently tight so leaving the house to actually do anything has happened rarely, which means I’ve gotten fancy less, I’ve done my makeup less, I’ve felt less me. I’ve felt frumpy and gross. For a bit I just kind of let that feeling linger, even when I put forth the effort into makeup and my overall look I just wasn’t feeling it and I couldn’t figure out why. Then oddly enough thanks to a person on my Facebook sharing an incredibly fatphobic post about how the body positive movement is all about ‘celebrating being unhealthy’ a lightbulb went off for me.
I had lost sight of what loving myself was about. I fell down the rabbit hole of aesthetics to mask my fat, to feel good and acceptable. I was playing the role of cute fashionable fatty and that’s quicksand.
The Fat Acceptance/Body Positive movements aren’t about being fabulous 24/7, they aren’t about celebrating being unhealthy, they aren’t about making a new mold for people to fit into. They are about loving yourself as you are, about being accepted on a personal and sociological level as you are.
‘As you are’ doesn’t mean only when you’re dressed to the nines, it doesn’t mean if you’re healthy, beautiful, or any other adjective.
The fact that people can’t see that as an amazing thing bums me out. The fact that I fell away from what this movement really means bums me out. But it has also redoubled my desire to make this oddly revolutionary idea that everyone is worthy of love and respect regardless of size, health, status, etc. the baseline.
So this is a reminder to us all of the new golden rule:
Love thyself when you’re too tired to put effort into your appearance, love thyself when you aren’t healthy, love thyself even when you’re body can’t do what you (or society) think it should, love thyself where you’re at, love thyself even when it’s hard back fat and all. Because if the old golden rule is all about treating others how we want to be treated then we have to start with loving ourselves for that to work.